But Will There Be Booth Babes?

E3 is dead and is set to be replaced by the Game Developers Conference which is held next week. As far as being a gamer is concerned these conferences really only mean one of two things. Firstly, it is a chance to see high definition footage of yet to be released games. Always good. Secondly, it was about the booth babes. In fact, to be honest, I really don't think that E3 did much for gamers at all it was more of a chance for developers to rub shoulders with each other and have a company paid holiday in the states. I have this perception of games developers which is probably completely cliched, but I imagine that when they get together to show off their new games they are like little kids saying, "My dad is better than your dad." So, what will the new event, the GDC, bring to the table for gamers?

I would like to say, first up that GDC is not a very catchy acronym. E3 was much better. It was simple, required less pronunciation and was easy to remember. I go to the GDC website (click here) and I cannot see one mention of booth babes. No booth babes? What is the deal with that? How are video games magazines meant to sell copies next month? They won't have any skin to put on the front cover (and the inside cover, and on the editorial, and on the feature for the conference). It is the only time that the video games magazines in Australia come close to looking like a Ralph or FHM for a month. The editors of these magazines must have been bitterly disappointed when they announced the death of E3. Firstly, they didn't have a company paid junket to the states once a year and secondly, they couldn't steam up their glasses looking at booth babes. The booth babes were so popular some crazy individual (or group of individuals) made their own website to promote them (www.e3girls. com). They even, sadly or stupidly, released their own HD DVD of the booth babes from E3 2006 (I bet you they don't do that at the international car shows. "Do you come with the car?" The gamers would be saying, "Do you come with the game?" and she says, "Oh you.").

Unfortunately, the GDC looks boring. It looks like it is focussed on work work work. Isn't E3 meant to be the time of the year (the only time of the year) when their geeky arses are treated like Rock Gods for a week? Instead they are relegated to participants in a boring conference. How are the developers meant to pick up the booth babes (by showing them their bank balance, of course, any girl will get around the geeky glasses for a shot at the loot) if there aren't any there? What will they do? Will they actually work for a week? This is completely insane. What has happened to the games industry? What has happened to the chance for developers to have that one time of year to let their hair down?

I wasn't overly concerned about the death of E3 to begin with. But now I am feeling the pain of the developers. E3 was their chance to be treated like royalty for a week. It was a chance for gamers to look at flesh which wasn't created with pixels.

The creation and implementation of the GDC seems to be indicative of what is happening to the games industry. It is being run and dominated by the collar and tie boardroom set who are turning this industry in to a massive multinational business. They are more at home in the boardroom sharing snorts of cocaine and feeling superior to everyone else rather than hanging out with the creative talent. The creative talent are just a means to an end. A means for them to make more money. Yet, it is the creative talent who have created and built the gaming industry. The suits are just leaches who can sense the smell of money from a thousand miles away and then attach themselves to the host, eventually killing it.

Let the suits rule the gaming industry and watch the creative talent die just as E3 has died. Just as the booth babes have gone. They were a distraction for the suits and their work. Bring back the booth babes. I didn't realise that their destruction was the single moment which marked an industry which is in decline.